How do you break up with someone

Are you in a relationship you want to get out of but just can't seem to find the right words?
Well here are 10 top tips from authors Penny Isaacs and Sarah Lockett.

1. Let’s be friends.
How about this good perennial friendship line? This is nice but will do the job. It lets the other person down gently since they can cling on to the belief that they can always work their way back into your affections – for a few weeks anyway.

2. I feel we’re more like brother or sister.
Ditto. A nice innocuous porky pie. It’s kind of a compliment too, as you’re saying you feel really relaxed and at ease with this person.

3. I know you love Croydon/Watford/Bristol but I have decided to relocate somewhere else - possibly Hull, Land’s End or Belgium.
Ah the old relocation, relocation, relocation excuse. I (Penny) have always wondered about the ending of that classic film Brief Encounter when the character played by Trevor Howard, a doctor, who has not advanced past first base in his romance with a drippy housewife tells her he is leaving the country to work in South Africa. A likely story.

4. It’s not you, darling!
It’s not about you. You are perfect. I need to sort myself out on my own. This is perilously close to the old “It’s not you, it’s me” line, but actually, it may be absolutely true if you have met the right person at the wrong time. Make sure you emphasise what a heel you are for ditching this fabulous, fragrant person though, otherwise she will be tempted to let rip.

5. I’ll call you next week.
A slightly cowardly one this, although if things are not going smoothly you will both know this is a call which is never going to be made. But nevertheless it can soften the blow when your new ‘ex’ is staring into to the abyss of never hearing from you again.

6. Do you like these beeswax candles? I am going to give up all worthless worldly goods/cut down my carbon footprint to the bare minimum and devote myself to a simple life within a radius of 5 miles of home.
She/he will possibly run a mile - or hop to the nearest airport. Wear hessian sandals as you say it and chant under your breath.

7. Caravanning!
I hate the sun. Aren’t you bored with the South of France? I always fancied caravanning/spending long periods of time at a simple retreat in Wales without running water and no electricity! Here’s the cesspit digging tool – you don’t mind mucking in, do you?

8. Shall we go Dutch?
Having invited her/him to dinner.

9. I am really getting into Buddhist chants/medieval poetry/modern opera.
Few people would stick around to listen to these on a Saturday night.

10. I fancy your mother/father(!).
Slightly tongue in check so this is strictly a last resort for a pest who won’t take hints i.e. someone who has not taken on board your messages in 1-9 above.

Seven common dating mistakes

Here are seven common dating mistakes we make brought to you by the author of 'Men are from Mars, women are from Venus' Dr John Gray.

Some of the most common blunders are:
1. Falling in love instantly
2. Mistakenly believing that a person will date with the same enthusiasm as they initially pursued
3. Pursuing more than you're being pursued
4. Not healing from old hurts and carrying this "baggage" into new relationships
5. Expecting that your date will be "different" with you than they were with their ex.
6. Not taking the time to get to honestly know someone BEFORE becoming intimate
7. Skipping dating stages -- going from attraction to intimacy to uncertainty
There are dating skills that can teach you to avoid these common blunders.
Unfortunately, what we see is that, until people learn to master these lessons, often they continue to repeat their patterns.
We understand that "Rome wasn't built in a day" and that it takes time to heal from old hurts and learn a new way to date.

Do you think this is where you might be going wrong or did you manage to avoid these blunders.
Let me know.

Speed Dating

Now this is something that I would only do for a laugh but people do seriously believe that this is where they will meet 'the one'.
The format of speed dating is the men move around the tables every five minutes and chat to the woman in front of them.
After looking into this form of dating I noted that when you arrive you are given a score card where after each 'date' you are asked to tick - date, friend and no thanks - and you also need to fill in your name and contact details.
You then hand this card into the host at the end of the evening who will then give your details out to anyone who has made a match with you.
It all seems a bit clinical to me but in a world where people are always on the go and find it difficult to meet new people this may be the only chance they get to meet someone new.
The best thing though about this event has to be the question suggestions on the score card.
These are supposed to help you along in finding whether this person is your perfect match.
Here are a few of my favourite suggestions -
1. Where and doing what would be your perfect holiday?
2. What is your favourite type of food and drink?
3. How would your friends describe you?
4. What type of music do you like?
5. What do you enjoy reading?
6. What sort of thing makes you laugh?
7. Who do you admire and why?
This next one has to be my personal favourite.
8. What is in your fridge?
And finally,
9. What is the craziest thing you have ever done?
Even on a regular length date if someone asked me what was in my fridge alarm bells would start to ring in my head.
I don't think this is the place to meet your one true love but I think I would like to give it a go, just to see what kind of people this form of dating appeals to.
Have you ever tried speed dating or is it something you might consider?
Let me know.